Taniya Salim
Bangalore! What a dreamy place to be in! Fresh air, amazing weather, the Garden City, and above all, wonderful people. NOT! Let’s be honest, whatever the perks of the city as compared to our hometowns, Bangalore is getting crowded day-by-day. And with more people pouring in everyday, the city is changing and so are the people in it.
Anyone’s first experience in Bangalore after getting out of the railway station or the bus stop is an encounter with the auto-drivers of the city. Everyone today can book cabs and autos online over Ola or Uber, but there are times your internet doesn’t work or your phone is out of battery. What do you do then? Let me take you through what types of auto-drivers you will meet. That should give you a heads up of what you can expect.
1. The “Kitna Dega?”
Explanation: This type of driver waits for you to go up to him and tell him where your destination is. After which, he will judge you according to what you’re wearing, what language you speak, and make an assumption that you can afford to pay the price of riding a chopper to sit in a vehicle that doesn’t even have doors. He will either tell you a rate that is so absurdly expensive or ask you how much you offer to pay him (that is what “Kitna Dega” means).
What should you do: You would always request the driver to charge you according to the meter. That is the safer option. If he refuses, you move on to the next driver.
2. The ‘Wanand Auf’
Explanation: If you’re going be in Bangalore for a while and are going be using the autos a lot, then you most definitely will come across the term, ‘Wanand Auf’. No, this is not something they say in Kannada, it is English – “One and a Half”
If you hear this phrase from the driver, it means that he intends to charge you 50% extra from the meter.
What should you do: You always try to negotiate and bring it down to just being charged over the meter. But if it is after 9.30pm, they are allowed to charge you 50% more for the journey. In such cases, make sure you are being charged only ‘One and a Half’ and not more than that.
3. The Chatter
Explanation: It is pretty obvious with the name isn’t it? This type of auto-driver not only talks too much while driving you to the destination, but also is so over-confident about his driving skills, that he actually tries to make eye-contact with you while driving on the ‘smooth’ roads of Bangalore. He will talk about his family, his journey of life, give you life advices, will ask you personal questions and make you feel uncomfortable.
What should you do: Just smile and nod. And hold on to dear life. Unless, of course, you are the chatty type who likes to live life on the edge too.
4. The Ignorer
Explanation: Well, if you ever feel like you want to boost your morale and feel on top of the world, you need to have an encounter with this type of driver (sarcasm, in case you are poor at detecting it). He will make you feel like your existence on Earth means nothing to anyone, anywhere, and you should just drop dead. You will be running around after a long day and would just want to go home. Here comes Mr. Ignorer, completely ignoring your presence when you ask him to take you home.
What should you do: Slowly Walk Away! It’s okay, nobody saw that. You are still a wonderful person.
5. The Moody Mumbler
Explanation: You need to keep in mind that in Bangalore, auto-drivers are think they are above you. Here, the phrase, “Customer is King” does not apply. So if you ask your driver to divert from the destination or ask him to go a little more ahead from what was agreed, get ready to hear him cuss you under his breath in a language that is foreign to you.
What should you do: Act like you can’t hear him. Or be loud and ask him straight out, “What did you say to me?” But only after you are out of the vehicle and have paid him. By confronting they usually just drive off, still mumbling under their breath.
6. The Disappointer
Explanation: Everyone in Bangalore has had an experience with this type of driver at least like a dozen times at some point or the other. You are constantly rejecting the driver for overpricing or being rejected because well, they can. Finally, you find someone that takes you on. You sit with this great relief, only to hear him overcharge you as well. This kind of heartbreak is different and indescribable.
What should you do: You immediately step out and continue your search for ‘The One’ that will take you home without burning a hole in your pocket.
7. The Life-Saver
Explanation: Does this even need an explanation? Yes, this is Him, ‘The One’ you have been waiting for. At first, it is hard to believe his simple nod. But then you see him switch on the meter and take off without saying a word.
What should you do: That is when you sink into the seat with great relief. Put on your earphones and cancel out everything else. I would tip him too.
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